Monday, July 9, 2007

I want to live, I want to give, I've been a miner for a heart of gold

Tonight I spent some time at the beach; alone with my thoughts. I felt happy. I found myself filled with a sense of coziness and cheer. As I walked, I felt the cool water under my feet and the sand between my toes. Imperfect memories stirred in my head, glazed with a heat shimmer and dusted with a warm summer breeze.

Recently, upon close examination of my reflection in the mirror, something is quite vividly apparent. There is life in my eyes again, a sincerity in my smile, a warmth in my heart. There are of course still times that I do what I do to feel closure. Acting upon impulse, living in the moment. There is a wanting to wipe the dirty window clean; that window which I have looked through for the last time. I regret nothing that has happened in past days, and prior evenings... I am not selfish, I am merely considering myself for once.

I am ensuring that my heart remains safe. I am ensuring that there is no opportunity for repeated heartache. A moment, an instant, I barely remember it happening. But what I do remember is feeling content, and ready to move on. A heart that held on so dearly for so many nights can finally let go. I am free.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Free is a good thing.