My fingers and toes were numb from the breeze that still felt like a spring night, despite the hot day of sun. I sat on the grass by the beach outside of my apartment before bed last night... breathing the air from the water, watching the tiny spots of clouds that scatter the skies. The brightness of the moon made everything a thousand shades of blue. These times, alone with my thoughts, these are important moments.
Photo: Betty Braun on Flickr
As I walked to yoga class with Keira in the sunshine yesterday, I was apprehensive about the pain that I could feel in my back. It was as though all of the negative feelings about myself and my body which had surfaced during our practice on Saturday had become tangled up in a knot, which had fixed itself right below my shoulder blades.
When the class began, we were reminded to focus on our breath. As soon as I made a point of doing this, of breathing into the parts of my body where I felt tension, the pain vanished. At first, I was conscious of the fact that I have a tendency to actively disparage my body. I was not going to do this. Instead, I chose to work on starting to develop a more loving relationship with my body. Towards the end of class, our instructor made mention of the fact that we should have gratitude for our bodies. We should be thankful for coming to class, for allowing our bodies and our souls to connect. I knew that she was right.
I left feeling completely fulfilled. The class was peaceful, but it also really worked my body. Yoga is a heart led practice. The role of our heart is to integrate and balance the different parts of who we are into a radiant sense of wholeness. Yoga is inclusive, not exclusive. I can't even begin to describe how lovely it is to practice in a non-threatening, unpretentious atmosphere. I think that I needed those negative feelings to surface in class on Saturday in order to move past them. They were a blessing in a sense, because they forced me to re-focus. Right now, my emphasis needs to be on body awareness, self-acceptance, and self-love. When you remember who you are and align yourself with what is truly important to you, you can return to your true nature of health and happiness, I have found.
On our way to pick up some delicious Indian takeout for dinner (plus a couple of very tasty treats for dessert,) I felt as though peace surrounded my heart, vibrancy was beating in my soul and I could feel the glow of positivity all around me.