I have always gone through phases of feeling completely frozen. My fears feel huge, overwhelming and unprocessed. It has nothing to do with anybody but myself and more than anything, is just a matter of being so completely caught up in my own shit that dragging anyone else into it seems unfair. As much as I want to pull myself out, there is no choice but to let it run its course. I cherish the friends who understand these phases of mine. During these times, quiet is the one thing that makes sense. I have started to see the world with new eyes. I am trying to look outside my own lines and rules into the challenges of others. It is transforming me. The vibration is higher, stronger, and I have much more clarity. This is the most beautiful way to see people, I am discovering.
Although the previous weeks have been filled with Christmas parties, celebrations and cute Santa suits, only today has it really hit me that in just a week, it will all be over for another year. On Saturday I will go out to my mom and dad's to spend some time with friends and family, engage in our favourite traditions and won't return to my apartment in the city until Boxing Day. Unfortunately, due to the short timeline for my upcoming selling season, I will have to go into the office while it's closed over the holidays in order to get my showroom set up and so that I can retain my sanity (at least to some degree) and feel prepared to take on my new role in 2008.
Despite the roller coaster ride of emotions that I have been on recently, I do genuinely delight in this time of year: giant mugs of hot chocolate, candy canes, sprinkles on cookies, coming home to twinkling lights, sipping egg nog lattes in the comfy chairs at Starbucks, hearing carols on the radio. Plus, I am obsessed not only with regular Christmas movies but also the really cheesy made for tv ones (and I recently discovered you can in fact rent many of them!) I love Christmas episodes of any television show too. I wish that they would release a dvd of a whole bunch of them, like Saved By The Bell, Friends, Beverly Hills 90210, Family Matters, The OC’s Chrismukkah episodes. I can't wait for this Sunday's Christmas episode of Brothers & Sisters. Tonight, I'm going to watch A Very Brady Christmas. Classic. I can't wait!
What is your favourite thing about this time of year? Do you have a favourite holiday tv show episode? or Christmas movie?
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EDIT: My super awesome friend Leah posted a special shout out to me on her Flickr page today. Thanks Louie! I love it! You rock!
Photo courtesy of Simone Hudson on Flickr
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EDIT: My super awesome friend Leah posted a special shout out to me on her Flickr page today. Thanks Louie! I love it! You rock!
Photo courtesy of Simone Hudson on Flickr
6 comments:
I just love having a tree. I couldn't believe how many people commented my blog saying they had no tree or a fake tree. It just isn't Christmas without my apartment smelling like pine.
Last night the boyfriend and I watched Love, Actually.
The Grinch Who Stole Christmas and Santa Who.
ELF! best xmas movie ever made.
Right now, Love Actually is at the top of my Christmas movie list. Oh, and Home Alone.
You look so cute in that picture!
Merry Christmas Charlie Brown and the Muppet Family Christmas.
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